Faith Grows

2011-07-25T19:17:00.000-07:00

pure joy on two faces as one, receiving his wrist band, exclaims, "Unlimited!" and the other grasps the reality of carnival rides where the tickets never run out

fireworks seated between husband and son, amid the excited shouts of "Here it comes!" and "Whoa! Look at that!"

the hands that cup and carry the airplanes, safely lifting off and landing, filled with my, and others', loved ones

warm air, blue sky, pulled cotton clouds, soft breezes, sand beneath my feet summer

worship and prayer, church in the park, pancake breakfast, sandcastle building, watermelon eating, who gets this kind of life? more than I could ever ask or imagine

daughter dribbling, fingertips forming pine trees on the hill of our castle fortress, joy again, there it is, joy again

ferry rides on a beautiful day, happy excited children, laughing, ready for adventure, a friend to share with, a pod of five orcas playing off the port side

quiet, still quiet, all the ache of the past months' torment, questions, seeking surface, deep cries out to deep, such deep sorrow, comforted by Your presence, the joy, beauty, people, gifts..who gets this kind of life? Father, Your love is extravagant.

Emmanuel - God with us.

You give and take away. My heart will choose to say, Lord, blessed be your name.

2011-06-28T22:15:00.000-07:00

I'm getting ready to go offline for the summer. At the end of a school year, through which I was ill much of the time and if not I, my children, has left my house in a terrible state. I haven't spent any time in the garden. I was walking through it tonight and noticed I've lost my Sweet Million tomato plants. It's sad, but I don't really care, I just can't do everything. This has to go, too, so I can focus on the renovations, the cleaning and the painting. I feel like I'm nesting, the same way I did during my pregnancies.

I keep waking up to the realization that this is the happiest time of my life. I went to write, "despite..." but see, that's what I keep waking up from. Life continues. It's not perfect, nor is it easy. It is, however, abundant and full, ever flowing, not stopping. Yes, there's too much to do, yes, there is not enough energy, yes, it can be chaotic, but I keep waking up from all that to the beauty and grace I experience in God each day.

Thank-You, Father, for:

901. wind, waves, rocks, dark water, dark clouds, sun breaks through
902. that I was there to share in the joy of accomplishment with a loved one
903. help from my son cleaning my kitchen
904. that I was there to share in the sorrow of my friend
905. the hope for tomorrow
906. that I was there to witness the fun my children had
907. a new friend
908. bike rides in the mornings
909. blogs at night
910. grace

What has God done so you will know that He is God?

2011-06-21T08:44:00.000-07:00

Here are some verses to consider. Have you been rescued, exiled, reunited, provided for? Consider your own life, looking for God's hand upon you, so you will know He is God.

Exodus 16:12 NIV
“I have heard the grumbling of the Israelites. Tell them, ‘At twilight you will eat meat, and in the morning you will be filled with bread. Then you will know that I am the LORD your God.’”

Leviticus 23:42-44 NIV
42 Live in temporary shelters for seven days: All native-born Israelites are to live in such shelters 43 so your descendants will know that I had the Israelites live in temporary shelters when I brought them out of Egypt. I am the LORD your God.’”

Joshua 3:9-11 NIV
9 Joshua said to the Israelites, “Come here and listen to the words of the LORD your God. 10 This is how you will know that the living God is among you and that he will certainly drive out before you the Canaanites, Hittites, Hivites, Perizzites, Girgashites, Amorites and Jebusites. 11 See, the ark of the covenant of the Lord of all the earth will go into the Jordan ahead of you.

1 Kings 20:28 NIV
The man of God came up and told the king of Israel, “This is what the LORD says: ‘Because the Arameans think the LORD is a god of the hills and not a god of the valleys, I will deliver this vast army into your hands, and you will know that I am the LORD.’”

Isaiah 45:3 NIV
I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.

Ezekiel 28:26 NIV
They will live there in safety and will build houses and plant vineyards; they will live in safety when I inflict punishment on all their neighbors who maligned them. Then they will know that I am the LORD their God.’”

Ezekiel 34:29-31 NIV
29 I will provide for them a land renowned for its crops, and they will no longer be victims of famine in the land or bear the scorn of the nations. 30 Then they will know that I, the LORD their God, am with them and that they, the Israelites, are my people, declares the Sovereign LORD. 31 You are my sheep, the sheep of my pasture, and I am your God, declares the Sovereign LORD.’”

Ezekiel 39:21-23 NIV
21 “I will display my glory among the nations, and all the nations will see the punishment I inflict and the hand I lay on them. 22 From that day forward the people of Israel will know that I am the LORD their God. 23 And the nations will know that the people of Israel went into exile for their sin, because they were unfaithful to me. So I hid my face from them and handed them over to their enemies, and they all fell by the sword.

Ezekiel 39:28 NIV
Then they will know that I am the LORD their God, for though I sent them into exile among the nations, I will gather them to their own land, not leaving any behind.

Joel 2:26-28 NIV
26 You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the LORD your God,
who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed. 27 Then you will know that I am in Israel, that I am the LORD your God, and that there is no other; never again will my people be shamed.

1 Timothy 3:14-16 NIV
Reasons for Paul’s Instructions

14 Although I hope to come to you soon, I am writing you these instructions so that, 15 if I am delayed, you will know how people ought to conduct themselves in God’s household, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and foundation of the truth. 16 Beyond all question, the mystery from which true godliness springs is great:

He appeared in the flesh,

was vindicated by the Spirit,

was seen by angels,

was preached among the nations,

was believed on in the world,

was taken up in glory.

Be still and know that He is God.

I praise You in the morning

2011-06-21T08:22:00.000-07:00

I love this practice of praise, how it lifts my heart, Lord! My eyes off me and my insecurities and fears and on You and Your goodness, Your presence here.

Thank-You, Father, for:
888. the tire swings, the climbing toys, the trampoline, the bikes to ride, softballs and gloves
889. tests to prepare for, for the children to take
890. my tests, just getting out of bed in the morning, choosing devotions, choosing kindness
891. this sore throat, sore ears, sore side, tired body that can still walk, talk, see, hear, love and serve
892. history, thank-You so much for Your story all through time, Lord, and for letting us read it and know You
893. sunshine on the hedge
894. food in the cupboards
895. a new day to spend with You
896. grace to try again
897. pleasant work we enjoy doing
898. time together
899. the beaches, purple starfish, giant moonsnail shells, tiny grains of sand
900. a day to rejoice in, this, too, a choice

Some rejoicing texts
Psalm 9:2
I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing the praises of your name, O Most High.

Psalm 13:5
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.

Psalm 16:9
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure,

Psalm 32:11
Rejoice in the LORD and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart!

Psalm 33:21
In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name.

Thank-You Father for:

2011-06-20T10:57:00.000-07:00

875. another new baby to celebrate
876. a new room on our house, shutting out rain and protecting from leaks
877. the right contractor at the right time
878. math they like
879. 2 weeks with my husband
880. 1 week with other homeschool families
881. waves on the sand
882. pebbles on the beach
883. sculpy clay
884. smoothies and bagels
885. that I can praise You, that I know You are God
886. hummingbirds and woodpeckers
887. sons who honour their father

I want to write a little...

2011-06-19T22:19:00.000-07:00

...about the slow and steady climb out of depression and the things God has done. Specific things God has taught me:

to roll out of bed in the morning, onto my knees and thank Him for the gift of today
to go outside every day, look around and just breathe - walking at least to the end of the driveway, at least once every day
to stop and give thanks to Him out loud for three things, and to keep a list of blessings somewhere I can see it
to remember the good things
to practice Philippians 4:4-8
to get down on my knees at the end of every day and pray, "Father, thank-You for this day, I give it to you, please make up the lack."
to praise Him if I am afraid, loudly...

Books:

Joyce Meyer - The Battlefield of the Mind
Beth Moore - watch her if you can, read Get Out of That Pit

There is this draw here...

2011-06-11T09:30:00.000-07:00

now I know that you are reading this blog, that wasn't there before. Before I was just talking to God on my keyboard, now I'm talking to people as well and it changes the dynamic. It makes me aware when time lapses, yet life is so abundantly full, that prayer takes place washing dishes, making beds, going for walks and does not need this medium, really. (Of course, Linda, you have always been there, faithful, but I knew you'd forgive me if I missed a week, or month.) There comes, too, the thought, that if I have a readership, there may be something worth reading and perhaps I should keep on, changing the dynamic again. I wonder if that's pride or ego, or just a sense of responsibility...Abba, Father, what do you desire of me?

Thank-you Father for:
867. sending a competent builder to fix the water damage in our house
868. having my husband home to work with him when it needed to be done
869. my one remaining butterfly with crumpled wings
870. children, such a lovely idea of Yours
871. pears
872. family vacation
873. columbine and Queen Anne's lace
874. my son's gift of humour

And this beautiful day, Lord. I feel so blessed just to be alive. This miracle of life with You, Your love remaining even though I clearly don't deserve it. Thank-You, Jesus, for what You've done for me, breaking off 30 years of deep depression and truly giving me new life, patiently showing me a new way to live, one filled with joy, hope and grace to try again every time I choose the wrong way or I make a mistake. For these past few years of air, light and love, thank-You. I praise You, Lord, because You are so worthy of my praise.

2011-05-30T22:45:00.000-07:00

I was just about to log-off when I thought of this page. I was going to log off anyway, but maybe this is a good way to end the day when I'm tired and down a bit, because God's love remains.

862. guitar playing son
863. butterflies climbing out of chrysalis
864. fresh green tips on fir trees
865. holding a tiny new baby
866. watching a movie with my children

Valuing What We've Been Given to Do

2011-05-24T12:39:00.000-07:00

As far back as I can remember, poor-little-me has gotten in my way. It slows me down and tires me out, distracts me and keeps me from accomplishing my work and generally keeps me mad, sad, reflective and unproductive. It is valuable to keep before me these facts:

God placed me here with a purpose,
He values what I do for Him,
Life is a gift and my work is a gift,
He gave me Himself,
In Him, I have all I need,
because I have all I need, I don't need to focus on me, but can focus on those He has placed me here to care for.

By focusing on my relationship with God, resentment and frustration often lose hold and I'm able to just enjoy who I am and what I do.

Thank-You Father for:
847. waking me up this morning
848. quiet time with my youngest to read and snuggle
849. good breakfast and lunch - healthy food to make us strong
850. reading, writing, arithmetic
851. big brothers to help younger siblings grow
852. grand adventures in wide open spaces
853. interesting people to share life with
854. enjoyable work to do
855. songs to sing and hum
856. wings forming inside papery chrysallis
857. song-filled chickadees, brave and friendly
858. amazingly fun free software
859. transition past, facing forward
860. windows to wash
861. people in my life, to pick up after, to cook and clean for, to plan for, to educate, to play with, to love

2011-05-18T23:23:00.001-07:00

842. caterpillars hanging from the lid, caterpillars turning into chrysallis
843. snuggly little babies
844. friends, time with friends
845. a home to retreat to
846. when I fall, when I fail, when I hate myself, Your love remains

Thank-You Father for:

2011-05-16T21:59:00.000-07:00

827. quickly growing caterpillars, still living
828. fresh washed sky, robed in rainbow
829. amazing leaves on tiny blueberry sticks
830. purple green leaves pushing through earth, blue potatoes left behind at harvest growing
831. the cutest little asparagus
832. strawberry flowers
833. massive oregano plants
834. children all ages, happily around the table playing a game together (with me)
835. that the things I can't fix are left in God's hands
836. new glasses, everything bright and sparkly clear
837. new beginnings
838. bright yellow ukuleles
839. tiny beet tops
840. curly green pea plants
841. exercise and fresh air!

Waiting on God

2011-05-03T08:29:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how waiting on God means...waiting. How keeping in step with the Spirit means slowing down, not running ahead then looking back to see where you lost Him and if He's still there. Ha, ha. I'm reminded of my kids when they were little and we used to go for walks and they'd be way up the sidewalk and I'd have to call them back and wait for them before I could turn the corner. I guess I haven't matured much, yet. But there's hope. My daughter quite often keeps in step with me on our walk now. Remember doing that? Pacing yourself so your steps fell into rhythm with your Mom's steps?

We have to wait for the power of the Holy Spirit to come on us, wait in God's presence, soak in Him, in His Word, in quiet in our prayer closet and our duties. Wait for the power to be witnesses.

Merriam-Webster online Definition of WITNESS
1: attestation of a fact or event : testimony
2: one that gives evidence; specifically : one who testifies in a cause or before a judicial tribunal
3: one asked to be present at a transaction so as to be able to testify to its having taken place
4: one who has personal knowledge of something
5a : something serving as evidence or proof : sign b : public affirmation by word or example of usually religious faith or conviction

We need to see God, personally know Him, experience the reality of Jesus' death and resurrection in our own life before we can testify. Again an again, when we lose hope, or lose our way, we need to stop and wait on Him. We need the power of the Holy Spirit to see God and the power to testify to His goodness in the face of difficulty and persecution. When I run ahead, I lose sight of God and lose that power to stand, so when difficult circumstances come my way or someone doesn't like me, I buckle and often fall into a state where I just believe anything the enemy throws at me. But, when I have waited and I know it was God I followed because I saw Him go ahead of me, on that point I'm solid and I can let it rest in His hands.

Has anyone else had that experience?

Today's passage: Acts 1:4-8 (Amplified Bible)

And while being in their company and eating with them, He commanded them not to leave Jerusalem but to wait for what the Father had promised, Of which [He said] you have heard Me speak. For John baptized with water, but not many days from now you shall be baptized with (placed in, introduced into) the Holy Spirit. So when they were assembled, they asked Him, Lord, is this the time when You will reestablish the kingdom and restore it to Israel? He said to them, It is not for you to become acquainted with and know what time brings [the things and events of time and their definite periods] or fixed years and seasons (their critical niche in time), which the Father has appointed (fixed and reserved) by His own choice and authority and personal power. But you shall receive power (ability, efficiency, and might) when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you shall be My witnesses in Jerusalem and all Judea and Samaria and to the ends (the very bounds) of the earth.

And so...

“Rejoice and exult in hope; be steadfast and patient in suffering and tribulation; be constant in prayer.” - Romans 12:12 AMP

My friends, may God our Father richly bless you through hope in Christ Jesus, our Lord and Saviour. To Him be the glory.

Hope for a New Day

2011-05-02T08:38:00.000-07:00

The rain pours down, so many sounds, dripping, pounding, rushing over the roof. Today is such a good day. Not because it's sunny, or rainy, though both of those are good things, but just because today in my heart, I know God desires relationship with me and enjoys my company. Because day by day, through this long dark storm my soul has been moving through, my faith has been renewed through reading His Word. I have been fed, nourished and carried. Paul says, "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."
Hebrews 12:11

I haven't enjoyed what I have been going through, but I carry this hope that I will be changed by it, that when it has done it's work, there will be a harvest of righteousness and peace. There is peace now, it passes understanding, because it is not deserved. I haven't fully applied what I've been taught, but God in His mercy, new mercy today and yesterday and a few days ago, has restored in my heart this faith that has bubbled up inside me with joy that comes from living in His presence and just knowing that He is good.

So, if you haven't got a Bible, go get one and read the love letter God has written to His children, for man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds from the mouth of God. (Deuteronomy 8:3) If you can't get one, leave me a comment and I'll do my best to get one to you.

God loves you so much, that He sent His only Son and whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have eternal life with Him. When you believe in Jesus, you will never be alone again. Not only will He be with you here in this lifetime, but you will be comforted by His presence and friendship all the days of existence. If you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart He is risen from the dead, you will be saved. Saved from hatred, fear and loneliness on this earth, saved from torment after this lifetime. If you say, "I have asked Jesus in to my heart, but I am still fearful, hating and alone," hold on. His comfort is coming. Keep praying, keep seeking, with all your heart seek God through His Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus is the only way to God the Father. If you seek Him with all your heart, You will find Him. (Reference: John 3:16, Romans 10:9)

Look at Bible Gateway. They have the Bible available in so many languages. I know many of you are not in Canada, English may not be your first language, so check there. I think it would be easier to absorb God's Word in your first language. And if you haven't asked Jesus to come into your heart, to take over your life, ask Him in now. There is a lot to learn, for sure, but He has so much grace for us.

And please, listen to this week's sermon at Powell River Foursquare Church on the purpose of church as family. It's not up yet, so check back in a couple days.

Thank-you Father, so much for:
811. renewed hope
812. amazing new mercy every morning
813. cherry trees exploding into blossom
814. the hum of the refrigerator
815. interesting things to look forward to learning with my children
816. new friends in the neighbourhood
817. little boys who wake up with enthusiasm
818. little girls who love to read quietly
819. streaks on my window
820. the drawing of roses
821. voting day!
822. life on a shared planet
823. bricks laid in patterns under walking feet
824. light poles to twirl around
825. people - happy, sad, angry, hopeful wonderful people everywhere created in the image of God
826. peace poems

We are loved, wanted and valued by the Living Creator - the One who designed us for relationship with Him and with the people we share life with. Blessed!

2011-05-02T07:42:00.001-07:00

1 John 5:14-15 NIV
"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us – whatever we ask – we know that we have what we asked of him."

Hebrews 11:6 NIV

2011-05-01T16:08:00.000-07:00

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”

2011-05-01T14:35:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking of the fragility of some dear friends, their humble hearts and quiet faith, their willingness to let me pray the prayers that God puts in me, and what it costs them to hope. Every day I walk with God, talking, listening, but aching because the things I pray for, the things inside me...

I think of Elijah (1 Kings 18 ): "After a long time, in the third year, the word of the LORD came to Elijah: “Go and present yourself to Ahab, and I will send rain on the land.” ² So Elijah went to present himself to Ahab." God sent, Elijah went.

36 At the time of sacrifice, the prophet Elijah stepped forward and prayed: “LORD, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Israel, let it be known today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant and have done all these things at your command. 37 Answer me, LORD, answer me, so these people will know that you, LORD, are God, and that you are turning their hearts back again.”

38 Then the fire of the LORD fell and burned up the sacrifice, the wood, the stones and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench.

39 When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried, “The LORD—he is God! The LORD—he is God!”

40 Then Elijah commanded them, “Seize the prophets of Baal. Don’t let anyone get away!” They seized them, and Elijah had them brought down to the Kishon Valley and slaughtered there.

41 And Elijah said to Ahab, “Go, eat and drink, for there is the sound of a heavy rain.” 42 So Ahab went off to eat and drink, but Elijah climbed to the top of Carmel, bent down to the ground and put his face between his knees.

43 “Go and look toward the sea,” he told his servant. And he went up and looked.

“There is nothing there,” he said. This is where I am. Last week I had two reports, "There has been change." and "There has been no change." Here a choice has to be made. I was sent, will I trust? I prayed as I was shown, will I see His glory revealed?

Seven times Elijah said, “Go back.”

44 The seventh time the servant reported, “A cloud as small as a man’s hand is rising from the sea.” The seventh time! God's Spirit keeps speaking inside me, "Don't give up, yet. Keep believing."

So Elijah said, “Go and tell Ahab, ‘Hitch up your chariot and go down before the rain stops you.’”

45 Meanwhile, the sky grew black with clouds, the wind rose, a heavy rain started falling and Ahab rode off to Jezreel.

Why do we pray for miracles, for healing?

“LORD, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Israel, let it be known today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant and have done all these things at your command. Answer me, LORD, answer me, so these people will know that you, LORD, are God, and that you are turning their hearts back again.”

2011-04-18T08:30:00.000-07:00

801. birds singing for their breakfast
802. removing a thorn from a dear old dog
803. making lunch for a son off to school
804. quiet stillness
805. time to think and pray
806. precious people, who, no matter what they are going through, are always caring about you
807. meals arranged for mom with new baby
808. high bunny hops
809. gigantic round orange moon in blue sky reflected on blue water
810. grace

Random Beauty from Last Summer

2011-04-16T22:41:00.000-07:00

Looking through last summer's photos, I wanted to share these glimpses of God's creativity and beauty. The hummingbird my daughter took, waiting hours, camera poised. The sea lions were captured by my husband, in a little boat rocking on the waves.

Hi!

2011-04-16T22:24:00.000-07:00

I just found stats on Blogger. I didn't know anyone was reading my blog. So "Hi!" (waves) That's nice, that we've connected :) I hope you find God here, and experience His love for you through His Son, Jesus Christ.
He is the best way to be connected.

Self-hatred and the Love of God

2011-04-14T09:24:00.000-07:00

Do you trust in God's love for you? Do you love yourself? Do you need to love yourself, to love others? If yes, Love 101 is "Love is patient." Are you patient with yourself? Have you ever given way to self-hatred?

I'm pondering these things right now. I met a lady who was paralyzed, after a horse accident, for three years. Her husband carried her into a church and she lay at the altar. Some women came and prayed over her. Their prayer was, "Lord, let her never doubt Your love for her," and she was healed. She walked out of the church. She's still walking today, many years later.

She gave me Henry Wright's book, A More Excellent Way to read. It is about the roots of disease, and not surprising is his summation that fear is the basis of most disease. If perfect love casts out all fear, and the forgiveness of sin leads to healing, it makes sense that guilt, shame, fear, etc, can cause sickness. One of the things I read was self-hatred is the root of some serious diseases. It caused me to look around at the people I know who are struggling with sickness, starting in the mirror. Self-hatred, which is a violent rejection of self, has certainly been prevalent, even dominant in my life. I have been struggling with this pain in my side, but haven't really wondered about it too much. I mean, I've had all the tests, but I know, that in my teens as I went from anorexia (self-hatred) to bulimia (self-hatred) to compulsive over-eating (self-hatred) I punished myself by beating my ribs and stomach with a baton, and that is where the pain is now. My body crying out for help and healing? For forgiveness? For assurance that God loves me? I don't know. I do know I definitely feel I deserve this pain. I embrace it as God's discipline.

So, from that place we come back to Love 101: Love is patient. I had someone say to me, "Wow, you are really hard on yourself." The reality is, I am no harder on myself than I am on everyone else. As I consider that mercy triumphs over judgement, and that I will be judged by how I judge others, I see the need to enroll in this class. Love 102: Love is kind seems easier than Love 101. Maybe I skipped those lessons? Ran ahead to learn kindness before learning patience? Can you really be kind, if you aren't patient? Can you ever move forward into all the other areas of love without patience? Learning to be patient with oneself seems necessary to be patient with others.

I'm learning to eat in a new way. I have set parameters to stay within and I'm not very good at it, but I'm learning. I'm learning that if I'm allowed 6 grain servings in a day, and a couple of those aren't a good hearty bowl of whole grains: steel cut oats, or brown rice, that I'm hungry, I'll keep eating and I'll eat 9 servings. To start again, I need to forgive myself and be patient with myself as I try to learn this new thing, so shrouded in fear of failure. Happy bi-product of this lesson, I'm becoming more patient with others. The fear is letting go and I am coming to a place of facing the self-hatred and rejection. I think we reject God when we reject ourselves. We at least reject His sovereignty and grace in the design of us and our lives. We doubt His love for us, and that doubt isn't just sin, it's a block to receiving all His goodness.

Lord, I pray that those who read this will never doubt Your love for them. May they find healing and freedom from self-rejection aand hatred and learn of Your patience and love. In Jesus' name, Amen

New Birds Out My Window

2011-04-11T19:43:00.000-07:00

Grey-headed junco, fox sparrow.

Music at my table; husband recording guitar strums, "This lLittle Light of Mine," grunge-style. Son rebuilding guitar, tells me I need to learn to see beauty in guitar.

Happy chatter over Lego in the sitting room. Children enjoying unexpected playtime before bed.

Light, dimming light beginning to tint of sunset, blue sky still, with slight pinkish glow.

Oh, it's been such a happy day. Very little pain. New eating plan doable and maintained. Fun family together times. Thank-You, Father.

Today's verse and song

2011-04-09T08:59:00.000-07:00

For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh:

(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)

Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.
2 Corinthians 10:3-6 (King James Version)

I Exalt Thee

Such a good day

2011-04-08T19:48:00.000-07:00

They are all good days at the end of the day tally. Usually around 3 p.m. and 7 p.m. I have to stop and consider the goodness of God, because all the energy has run out and I'm tired, and for whatever the reason I slip into despair when I'm tired. Maybe I'm afraid of being tired? Weird.

The thing is, whether it's 3 p.m. or 7 p.m. or 1 o'clock in the morning, there is always evidence of the goodness of God upon pondering. God is good. He's constant. He's true and sure and lovely and everywhere.

Hidden Things

2011-04-06T08:43:00.000-07:00

What is it inside you that means the most to you? Do you know? When you face death, and all else fades away, what is left there? What are you holding onto and does it hold any lasting value?

There are a few things that are important to me. To be in my Father's arms when I reach heaven. To see His smile. To be in my husband's arms here on earth. To share heaven with everyone I love, everyone I meet, everyone I hear of and can pray for. To raise my children in the truth of God's word, with living hope. To see them live for Christ.

And while I'm here, to treasure each moment with them, to know and understand them, to fill them with love and good things. To minister encouragement to those God brings me to. Kindness...kindness matters.

I want a clean house, to be a good housekeeper and a good helper for to my husband. To be out of debt. To to leave nothing behind for my family to deal with when I leave this earth, but memories of loving and being loved.

My faith is weak, my body is weak, these desires are rarely fulfilled. But I seek them, with hope, when I seek out my Lord, that my time remaining be time spent in love, in strength, in service so they can know His love, His strength, His service and live lives filled with living hope.

Every day is a new day and a gift. Some days I'm sure I'll live many years and some days I don't think I'll make it through to bedtime. The pain is unexplained and awful. But it's just pain. If I can remember that, I have a great day. If I forget and get scared, I sink to the depths of despair and become vulnerable to anything the enemy throws at me. Still, I cling to this silver thread of hope, tied to a Saviour worth living for. Living hope. It's all because of Jesus I'm alive. He lives on in me.

791. Thursdays
792. toast with seeds in it, thin bread that toasts crunchy
793. a heater that just plugs into the wall and heats instantly
794. quiet mornings without a pressing schedule
795. tiny new babies
796. smiling babies with giant blue eyes who coo and blow bubbles
797. preparing pink, white and red food for a baby shower
798. lots of little girls all in one place
799. friends who gather to celebrate life
800. sunshine peeking through the curtains, promise of a beautiful day

To listen to more on living hope: Northgate Powell River Foursquare Church

El Roi - the God who sees

2011-04-04T13:51:00.000-07:00

Storms swell as the pain inside rips me apart. I cling, knuckles clenched, to the edge of the stove and cry out, "This, too, this pain, is a gift and I will praise You for it, Lord, for You are worthy of my praise." Tears stream down, "I will hope. I will obey. It will be hard. I will need help. I will hope."

My son comes upstairs, glances over and sees. "Are you ok, Mom?" I shake my head.

The phone rings. I grit my teeth and wipe my eyes, resolved. "Hi Dad!," little one says, "Mom, it's Dad."

I hear his voice and whisper "Hi."

"Are you ok?" he asks. My resolve melts away into tears and I tell him the truth. I'm hurting. I'm surviving.

We talk of his day a bit, and say good-bye. "I'm sorry you're hurting. I love you," he says. Echoes from heaven.

Dinner made, children fed, story read, dishwasher going, I turn off the light at 7:30 p.m. The battles hush and I sleep. I awaken at 12:45 a.m., crawl out of bed and into the arms, the words, of the God who sees me.

The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying:

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.
I will build you up again, and you, Virgin Israel, will be rebuilt.
This is what the LORD says:

“Restrain your voice from weeping and your eyes from tears,
for your work will be rewarded,” declares the LORD.

781. seasons that pass and fade into memory
782. firey trials that purify
783. quiet words of comfort in the dark of night
784. joy that comes in the morning
785. answered prayer and peace among us
786. our heavenly Husband and Father present among us
787. change where change needs to take place
788. bunny cuddles\
789. story snuggles
790. daughter drawing and colouring, content

2011-03-17T22:20:00.000-07:00

766. a single purple crocus in an empty garden bed
767. children building tents in the yard.
768. hard questions from my nine year old - "will we have to stay inside all the time now?"
769. hives on my hand
770. saying good-bye, anticipating the return
771. robins!
772. the man who stopped me to show me the buds on the tree and marvel at spring's arrival
773. warm soil
774. spinach seeds
775. pink clouds, blue sky
776. tiny baby miracle dressed in pink
777. my husbands voice
778. prayers given to pray
779. meals all arranged
780. worship

Thank-You Father for:

2011-03-14T23:13:00.000-07:00

756. the light and shadow interplay in the soft folds of the curtain
757. tiny wild blueberries on pancakes
758. young fingers on piano keys, just delighting in making music
759. packing with son for his first mission trip
760. quiet house, gentle sounds of breathing
761. trained soldiers: searching, carrying, evacuating, helping
762. lives spared among the rubble
763. the ability to learn a new way
764. celebration of life with a room of beautiful ladies
765. the presence and patience of God

Look up!

2011-03-14T23:01:00.000-07:00

The earth tears apart like a garment, rents and tears leave buildings smashed and waves rolled high, cars on rooftops and precious elderly lying on cold floors. S.O.S. spelled out atop buildings, "Help! Find us here! Send someone to help!" Running people, crying people, dying people, searching people. What do we do when the seams come apart?

Look up.

Lift up your eyes to the heavens, look at the earth beneath; the heavens will vanish like smoke,
the earth will wear out like a garment and its inhabitants die like flies.
But my salvation will last forever, my righteousness will never fail. Isaiah 51:6

We know, followers of the Creator, readers of His book, that this is just the beginning.

But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare. Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming. That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat. But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, where righteousness dwells. 2 Peter 3:10-13

I see before my eyes a giant God and a tiny earth, the clouds roll back and people, everywhere, scream and run. I read Matthew 24. It is not natural, worldly, to be comforted by the appearence of Almighty God. “Look, he is coming with the clouds,”and “every eye will see him, even those who pierced him”; and all peoples on earth “will mourn because of him.”So shall it be! Amen. Revelation 1:7

But, oh, our hearts cry out, "Come, Lord Jesus!" Revelation 22:20

Pain sears across my insides, my heart remembers;

The fifth angel poured out his bowl on the throne of the beast, and its kingdom was plunged into darkness. People gnawed their tongues in agony and cursed the God of heaven because of their pains and their sores, but they refused to repent of what they had done. Revelation 16:10-11

I repent. I turn to follow Him. I cry out for mercy, me a sinner, great sin. I listen, I make the change, then I forget...and cry out for mercy again. I receive mercy. How patient is God. Yet the end of His patience draws near.

Oh, how His heart desires all would come to Him willingly to receive what He freely gives. Run to Him, not from Him. Bow, bow the knees before Him. Worship Him with gladness of heart, that He may gather you close, calm all your fears, carry you through these days. Draw near. Seek the Lord while He can be found.

I am only eyes, these are the things I see.

Look up!

More on an Easy Life

2011-03-08T10:48:00.000-08:00

This morning we read the stories of Gideon and The Widow's Oil. In both stories the people did what God said, the way He said to do it, and God met their needs in amazing ways. It is God's desire to care for us, to receive that care we must live within His will. Really, our ways are not better than His, no matter how much we think they are. He's laid things out in a certain way, for reasons He clearly understands, even if we don't.

During my quiet time this morning, I read in Come Away, My Beloved, "If you refuse My loving care, you will be cut down by others who have no concern for your soul." I sat and considered how many times that has happened to me. And how many times, when my children have refused my loving care, they have been cut down...often by friends, who truly don't care for their souls.So often, people's expectations or desires of us have very little to do with our souls.
We talked around the table, and my children drew things out of the stories I had missed. And we talked of self will and God's will, of His care and provision. We are very self-willed around here - not just my children. I started with an example of my self will, sleeping in an extra hour and how, although my morning chores were all done, breakfast was an hour late and that affected everyone. They could see that, had experienced the hardship of my self-will. During our discussion, all our hard hearts softened. Everyone at the table got it this morning.

Ann's book calls us to thank God for the hard things as gifts as much as the good things. To thank Him for the beauty and the pain. To keep our eyes open, our hands cupped and our hearts soft. God is speaking this message to from all sides, so I guess I don't, and I need to. I'm listening. Adding...

Living love is so much better than living bitterness, hatred, fear. Living obedience in His presence is so much better than living without His guidance, lost, bewildered and alone. If you, like me, have always wanted an easy life, may I encourage you to rise to the challenge to live an abundant life with Christ instead? Count it all joy, dear friends. He is worthy of our praise!

I'll leave you with this:

"We must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God." - Acts 14:22

God's people have their trials. It was never designed by God, when he chose his people, that they should be an untried people. They were chosen in the furnace of affliction; they were never chosen to worldly peace and earthly joy. Freedom from sickness and the pains of mortality was never promised them; but when their Lord drew up the charter of privileges, he included chastisements amongst the things to which they should inevitably be heirs. Trials are a part of our lot; they were predestinated for us in Christ's last legacy. So surely as the stars are fashioned by his hands, and their orbits fixed by him, so surely are our trials allotted to us: he has ordained their season and their place, their intensity and the effect they shall have upon us. Good men must never expect to escape troubles; if they do, they will be disappointed, for none of their predecessors have been without them. Mark the patience of Job; remember Abraham, for he had his trials, and by his faith under them, he became the "Father of the faithful." Note well the biographies of all the patriarchs, prophets, apostles, and martyrs, and you shall discover none of those whom God made vessels of mercy, who were not made to pass through the fire of affliction. It is ordained of old that the cross of trouble should be engraved on every vessel of mercy, as the royal mark whereby the King's vessels of honour are distinguished. But although tribulation is thus the path of God's children, they have the comfort of knowing that their Master has traversed it before them; they have his presence and sympathy to cheer them, his grace to support them, and his example to teach them how to endure; and when they reach "the kingdom," it will more than make amends for the "much tribulation" through which they passed to enter it. Charles Spurgeon

The promise of Spring

2011-03-04T14:07:00.000-08:00

751. videos of our bunny, taken by our girl
752. one giant pampas grass stem, pointing straight into the sky
753. baskets in the apple tree awaiting spring blooms
754. pots filled with dirt ready for the plantings

It must be almost Spring. I haven't wanted to go outside at all. "Too cold," I say to my husband." He laughs at me. Tells me I don't know what cold is, coming on the weekend from weeks spent at 40 below. He's right. I can't even fathom that kind of cold. But today, looking out the window, I can almost smell summer. My eyes see large leafy vines holding yellow squash and rows and rows of sugar snap peas. A tomato garden filled with geraniums and marigolds, chives and basil...

755. the promise of Spring

2011-03-02T22:26:00.000-08:00

I've been spending time close with the Father who lets me lay my head on His chest and listen to His heartbeat. With growing wonder and awe I have witnessed His delight in caring for His children. Providing food and clothing. The very basics. And as I understand His heart better, fear slips away.

2011-02-28T09:49:00.000-08:00

741. waking up
742. a special pan for pancakes and pancake molds
743. brown leaves on green grass
744. jamming with family and friends
745. pileated woodpeckers
746. medicine flavoured so children can swallow it
747. pharmacists who prescribe it
748. looking out over the lake while having dinner with my husband - just my husband
749. candlelight flickering on the table
750. new songs to learn

This has been a great weekend. Happy sigh :)

I Praise You God, for You are Worthy and Thank You for All Things

2011-02-23T17:27:00.001-08:00

729. son singing along to worship radio, in the car, in the seat behind mine
730. daughter seeing the salt lines on the road for the first time, and finding God in them
731. snow, feathered, large, swirling, falling, but not sticking on the ground
732. hot cup of soup, on a cold day, in a tired moment

Chicken cooks on low so I can type, making moments to get it down. The wonder that overpowers exhaustion and lifts my heart in praise. God is good.

733. toes wiggling
734. control yielding
735. hard punk giving way to blues and Billy Joel
736. him home tomorrow

Children watch a movie, a rare treat. Doctor's, pharmacy, gymnastics, drum lesson, bringing in firewood made up the day. She is sick, both are tired. They are snuggled up under blankets, next to the wood stove, cozy and warm. I close my eyes for a moment, not seeing all that is undone, screaming for attention. I linger behind eyelids, remembering what has been done and what now is like, and it is good. Home is good. God is here.

737. the smell of popcorn
738. a funny yellow shirt
739. son with a purpose
740. teens who come in and eat and don't care about the house

This gift I've been given. It can only be seen clearly if the eyes aren't wandering off to look at what it could be and the heart and mouth are filled with praise, thanksgiving and contentment, not worry, fear and complaint. I'm wide awake, startled awake by these words:

Psalm 106:24-27

Then they despised the pleasant land;
they did not believe his promise.
They grumbled in their tents
and did not obey the LORD.
So he swore to them with uplifted hand
that he would make them fall in the wilderness,
make their descendants fall among the nations
and scatter them throughout the lands.

May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14

2011-02-18T20:28:00.000-08:00

684. eggs boiling on the stove
685. warm water for my shower
686. warm water
687. water
688. winter rains
689. clean clothes to put on
690. brushing my hair
691. brushing my teeth
692. facecloths
693. toothbrush and toothpaste
694. handwriting - especially 8 year old manuscript and 11 year old cursive. I just love letters
695. times tables
696. bunny kisses on my nose
697. sitting by a fire
698. talking with my grown son
699. letting my husband make decisions, trusting him and trusting God, grateful for his covering
700. Spotted Towhees, especially the juveniles
701. parquet floors
702. periwinkle blue gingham curtains
703. young son's eyes popping at first sign of snow
704. when they come home - any of them, from anywhere
705. remembering the good
706. the rhythmic sound of the dryer
707. daughter's kisses
708. sitting on the staircase when all is quiet at night to journal or pray
709. a warm house when there's snow outside
710. motherhood
711. grace for handling pain
712. us - our family - being us
713. having a home
714. and a family to share it with
715. a family to care for
716. and children to teach
717. snow covered plant pots
718. bunny stretched tall
719. precious child sleeping
720. son's Bob the Tomato Bible cover
721. son doing laundry, on his own
722. children at table for breakfast and devotions
723. apple peanut butter cinnamon buns, hot from the oven
724. acoustic guitars
725. youngest son reading to me
726. sunlight in February - shining, dancing, glimmering, warming
727. fresh green parsley
728. child's excitement at lost book found

Have you ever had a day when...

2011-02-03T13:21:00.000-08:00

...everything you plan for school just doesn't work and you can either get frustrated or angry, or put away the schoolwork, pull out your child's favourite picture books, read the stories, then copy pictures from the books? Then you eat hot dogs or macaroni and cheese and voila! a failed day is suddenly a special day and instead of your children remembering you as a mean mom, they remember a wonderful day?

This is that kind of day.

Thank-you, Father.

All God's glory

2011-02-01T07:52:00.000-08:00

This week of star filled skies, bright pink, orange red sunrises and sunsets, the frost on the grass and sunny days. The echo of of sea lions playing in the straight, watching them leap out of the water. A tiny, dried out, four-legged starfish, shaped in a cross, in the hand of a child, eyes filled with wonder. The echo of God's words in my heart, "I'm here. I'll never leave you nor forsake you. I'll help you. I love you. You are Mine. Don't be afraid." His creation, His beauty, His story, His wonder, His promise.

His glory.

Sourdough in the breadmaker

2011-01-19T08:17:00.000-08:00

I've been experimenting over the past couple weeks (because I don't have an oven) and find, despite what you read on the internet, that you can bake sourdough bread in the breadmaker. You just let it go through the dough cycle, then let it go through the bread cycle. If you have time, you can let it rest in between the two cycles, that will sour it more.

Those who hunger and thirst after righteousness will be filled.

2011-01-18T22:41:00.000-08:00

Do you ever read the sermon on the mount and think, "That was nice, that makes me happy to think about," without actually hearing what it says?
God has laid it on my heart to focus on Matthew 5-7 this school year. So we've read it through a few times, every couple days, the kids copy another verse into their booklet. Right now we are working on the "blessed's" in the beginning of chapter 5. I am spending a lot of time pondering these verses.

I know that God comforts those who mourn. Who mourn personal loss, sadness in life, sin in the world or in themselves. God comforts those who go to Him when they are mourning. Different commentaries say different things, but that doesn't change the fact that our Father is the God of all comfort.

I truly believe that those who are pure in heart see God. They see Him everywhere, in everything. They know He is in control, they trust Him with the outcome, they experience Him in the moments of their days. They see Him before them, so they know what to do, what the Father's will is.

But God showed me today that I kind-of skipped the first one, because I didn't really believe it. See, I hunger and thirst for righteousness; in my own life, in my family's life, in my neighbourhood, my church, the world. I want it, I want things to be the way God designed them to be, because His ways are so beautiful, so wonderful, so perfect and peaceful and good. Instead, however, of receiving this verse as truth, I've rejected it with fear of disappointment. Somehow, I've read it as, "Those who hunger and thirst for righteousness will experience starvation and dehydration." "They will die hungry." "They will never know what it means to be satisfied and at peace."

I had someone say to me one day that there was a short circuit in my receiving of what God said. I wasn't quite getting it. I think the same must be true of the way I've received this verse, because what it actually says is "will be filled." As in, satisfied, up to the top, He prepares a table before me...and my cup overflows. I'm hungry for the will of God to take over my life AND IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN!

That calls for some serious rejoicing! Do you know why? BECAUSE GOD IS FAITHFUL! His Word is true, He means what He says.

Whoever convinced me at whatever point that my life is hopeless was wrong. God is with us. He is for us. And He is good. I experience His goodness every day. Bit by bit, I think He is rewiring my understanding of Him :)

2011-01-17T10:49:00.000-08:00

November 4, 2010

A word from the Lord for those disgruntled with the Church, both within and without it's door.

If the Church is preaching the Word of God,

I AM there.

If the Church is preaching Christ - Son of God, Son of Man, crucified, resurrected and ascended to the throne of heaven,

I AM there.

If the Church is preaching repentance, a return to God and forgiveness through the blood of Christ,

I AM there.

The Church is My Bride and I love her. I walk with her, guide her and tenderly lead her. I have not forsaken her, abandoned her or forgotten her.

I am about to come on her with power and release her for holy purposes. She has been bound, I set her free for the sake of My glory.

God with us

2011-01-04T11:25:00.000-08:00

I had a happy Christmas. I was sick, my son was sick and there were moments when I was pushed beyond measure, anxious, frustrated, irritable and frantic. Those were unhappy moments, thirty-seven bad seconds in a whole good year. But Christmas was happy. I want to tell you why.

Because Linus knew the real meaning of Christmas and it made Charlie Brown smile.

And it made me smile, those words of truth in the midst of all the nonsense.

And because our work is to believe in Jesus, and Mary carried Him within her, and brought Him into the world, and we carry Him with in us and carry Him into the world and at Christmas, this call with all it's pressures, decisions, trials, questions, exhaustion, failings, it all comes down to this simple truth, portrayed in this simple, yet unforgettable story. We carry Jesus within, and we bring Him into the world.

Joy.
Peace.
Hope.

God is with us.

Grace Flows Down

2010-12-10T10:06:00.000-08:00

"I've told them I won't be in the next set," I say, and breathe slowly, swallowing the fear.

"Oh. Why?" he responds, this man I love to the depths. My husband, who pulled our son aside and said, "I've wanted to do this for your mom forever, don't ruin this for her," because when my son heard I was to have voice lessons, he asked if he could, too. And I said yes, he may join mine.

"With him not passing his driver's test and me still needing to do all the driving, it's too much for me. I need to be at home, at least one day a week, or things fall apart here. There are things that are more important to me right now."

"What things?" He's trying so hard to breathe, to not get mad, but he knows what I'm going to say.

"That the dishes are done and the laundry. And I need to support him right now. It's either me giving this up, or him needing to give up his marketing class or his work for the youth resource center."

"It is better for him to give something up. He's spoiled rotten. He keeps taking things on! He doesn't even think! He needs to learn there are limits!"
It's true, we both know it's true. Hubby's shoulders slump a bit as he lets go of his dream realized, and I move away before he sees me cry. He knows it meant much, but I don't want him to see how much. This decision was rent out at the base of the cross. Dying to self always is.

One thing I know, the thing that is most important to me right now, is that my son sees love laid down. We love by laying down our lives, our hopes, our dreams, for another. He needs to see it, it must be modelled for him. The path must be laid straight for him to follow on it.

I think this is the greatest gift of motherhood, this constant laying down. Perhaps it is the greatest gift of Christianity, after Salvation and adoption into God's family.

Worship will continue all the days of this life and eternity. There is so much more time for me to learn what is needed. There is so little time left for me to live out my faith daily before my children's eyes. People keep saying to me, "But you have to do something for you." When they say it, they just don't understand. I benefit from all of this. For these children I prayed, and God answered me. May I lay it all down, and at the end of my days here, may God find nothing of me left. And may God bless my wonderful husband, who modelled all this for me, and laid the path for me to follow.

I'm cold today

2010-11-29T08:26:00.000-08:00

I've tried and tried to light a fire, but to no avail. How do forest fires start? Only in God's mercy do we ever have a fire. He must be teaching me something. The cold has settled in me.I cry.

The verse in my inbox says, "Give thanks to the Lord for He is good, His love endures forever."

Thank-You Father For:

the roof over my head that keeps the rain out
the walls around me that keep the wind out
the warm clothes and bedclothes our family has
food in the cupboards and freezer
strength to do the work You've given
eyes that see, ears that hear and hearts that understand Your love for us
praises in my inbox
crackling downstairs...I must go check that would stove

...to Him who is able to present us before the throne, blameless and pure with great joy, to Him be the glory...

Thank-you Father for:

2010-11-28T23:12:00.000-08:00

friends come home
feeling better
words of love and affirmation
laughter
white lights on green boughs
blue glass birds, and rainbow ones of yesteryear
children running, dancing, singing, playing
the voice of truth
rain and wind that melt snow
burnt toast

Into Your hands I commit my spirit...

Quiet snow falls...

2010-11-22T11:30:00.000-08:00

Quiet snows falls and I let go of this week's busy plans, because I don't drive in snow. He makes me lie down in green (covered in white) pastures and leads me bside still (frozen) waters, He restores my soul...

Thank-you Father, for:
food in the cupboard
birdseed for the sparrows, towhees, chickadees and Stellar's jays
wood for the fire
grown son home from college, ready to start the next part of his journey
the quietness of snow

Thank-you Father

2010-11-15T10:27:00.000-08:00

for the grace to extract from reluctant learners pages of math, handwriting and spelling

for the grace to have school snuggled on the couch before a roaring fire

for the grace to say no when pressured to give in

for the grace to know these things they battle are not the priority I homeschool for

for the grace to be their mom, day in and day out, and to have so much joy in the process

Gifts and love and gifts of love

2010-11-08T09:45:00.000-08:00

The past five weeks our pastor, Sam,, has been preaching on 1 Corinthians, and the past three weeks have been breaking my heart and God has been reaching deep. I want you to listen. http://ngatepr.podomatic.com/

Thank-you so much Father, for:

651. the way You put life together
652. the people you draw around us
653. that You never give up on us
654. that no matter how far we've fallen, we can always start again with a song of worship to You
655. for the gifts that make us part and the love that gives us value

I want to say that I'm almost done here, for it is not in the writing, but in the song that I find God. For those who have read, and shared in this expression of faith, blessings to you.

2010-11-01T09:16:00.000-07:00

He was only 21 months, my eldest, this child dedicated in ceremony, the question of Halloween. "Father, is it just some fun holiday we can take part in? Or is it a celebration of evil that grieves Your heart?" And when He answered, the answer went deep and stayed there, directing our steps and prayers and bringing us to this place of non-observance.

So when my church family announced a candy carnival, opening the church to give children of our town a safe place to get candy, the cost ran high, because we live and move and breathe this body, but not all is for us and we stayed home. "Sometimes God has different things for us, we have to listen and walk in the Spirit." I say, quietly praying for understanding in my children's hearts, lessons deep imprinted. We are called into the dark places to bring light, that is the heart of our church, but God is preparing our children for His purposes and perhaps this lesson is the most important thing tonight.

I read the comments of the evening, it went well and was full of fun. There were things we missed that we would have liked to been a part of. Still, my heart fills with contentment and gratitude for what we were given.

641. a quiet night at home
642. games to play
643. laughter, many silly giggles and funny antics
644. hot chocolate and apple cider
645. a gift of cookies from a dear friend
646. peace, protection from the storm
647. snuggles and stories
648. time for homework to be done
649. a wonderful church family to live and move within
650. the love of God

His Indwelling

2010-10-30T13:32:00.000-07:00

We think we need to be someone else, somewhere else, for God to use us. We think we need a certain talent, a certain skill, a certain work for God to use us. We think it's about the gifts in us and not the God in us. We forget that his indwelling is the only reason he can use us.
Found here: http://www.thehighcalling.org/culture/god-wants-use-you

What Would You Rather Be Doing?

2010-10-27T12:43:00.000-07:00

"There's a million things I'd rather be doing than this!" I think, catching myself before I scream it at my children, both who are fighting the things I've designed for this morning. I swallow it down quietly instead, and it churns in my stomach, the anger sitting there.

"What would you rather be doing?" the Spirit asks quietly.

I think about it and the anger dissipates, because really, there is nothing I'd rather be doing. It is hard, homeschooling two iron-willed children who just want to play. Hard, but not without a full measure of joy. This is a good life we've been given, one to be grateful for and not to be mourned. Bookwork isn't their favourite thing, these basics I'm trying to give them, but discovery is. When we move through the days in discovery mode our lives are filled with wonder and laughter. This life is a gift. Homeschooling is a gift. Today we struggled with writing and arithmetic, but had a good discussion during our Bible study. It's taking what we discussed and walking it out, me ahead of them so they can follow me, that requires something...grace, maybe.

And if they watch me struggle and witness me quietly remove myself, go into my bedroom and onto my knees to find at the foot of the throne that which I need to make our message a reality...is that enough to justify their being here and not in school? Do you get that sometimes? That question? "How do I justify them not being in school if they aren't learning anything?"

The answer is, my audience is One. He is the one who justifies and He knows exactly what lessons need to be taught here and how much is being learned. So if I erase the word "success" from my expectations and I keep seeking grace to do that which I have been called to do, that is enough for me.

I rise and return to the table, watch the juncos, chickadees, towhees and Stellar's jays through the window. We finish the lessons, and my children, too, fly out to freedom. They swing and play.

And there's nothing I'd rather be doing than this.

2010-10-25T22:32:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a lot about Christopher Robin, how he struggled as he grew to become a man and leave the child behind. Certainly it wasn't his parent's desire to cause him to struggle so. There's so much I could say here every day and I used to, before this blog, in others, but now my heart echoes, "Are there names safe in your mouth? Under your fingertips?"

My daughter asked tonight if she could read my blog and I said, "of course," but I wonder how she felt, our household exposed as it was? I haven't asked her. I think I should.

Happy

2010-10-25T22:10:00.000-07:00

Matthew 5:1-12 (Worldwide English Version - New Testament)

1When Jesus saw the many people, he went up on a hill. He sat down and his disciples came to him.

2He began to teach the people.

3He said, `God makes happy those who know that they need him. The kingdom of heaven is for them.

4`God makes happy those who are sad. They will have comfort.

5`God makes happy those who quietly trust him and do not try to get their own way. The world will belong to them.

6`God makes happy those who are hungry and thirsty for what is right and good. They will be filled.

7`God makes happy those who are kind. He will be kind to them.

8`God makes happy those who have clean hearts. They will see God.

9`God makes happy those who make peace between people. They will be called God's sons.

10`God makes happy those who have trouble for doing what is right. The kingdom of heaven is for them.

11`God makes you happy when people say wrong things about you, when they trouble you, and when they say all kinds of lies about you. God makes you happy when it is for my sake.

12Be happy and glad because God will be good to you in heaven. In the same way people troubled the prophets before your time.'

Thankfulness brings Joy

2010-10-25T09:31:00.000-07:00

"Please may I..." and "Thank-you for..." are resounding off the walls here this morning. Daddy has instituted a manners chart, and the payout is huge: 10 cents per please or thank-you! There is a balance in place, minus 20 cents per forgotten manner or act of disobedience, but there's a problem with that. I remember the pleases and thank-yous but quickly forget the offences. So, this little chart may cause quite a dip in the coin jar :)

Do I mind? Not really. It makes me grateful for my Father in heaven who remembers my pleases and thank-yous, but quickly forgets my offenses. For Jesus died to pay the price for my sins, and took the wrath I deserved, which leaves happy faces on my chart. This good news does not lie stagnant, but keeps me moving forward, pressing on to know Him more, understand His will and live for His purpose.

In my kitchen, the politeness has dissolved into argument, but Daddy's right there to get things back on track. I'm grateful for that, too. For the Daddy here in my kitchen, and for my heavenly Father, always right there to get things back on track when they dissolve into sin. It's a happy day. As things are made right, I'm again ready to focus on His praise and sing a joyful song to my God.

Thank-You Father for:
531. the spider bite at 2 a.m. that got me out of bed to pray
532. the rain and leak in the ceiling that revealed the hole in the deck
533. the perfect timing, my resourceful husband right there to fix it
534. the new tarp that blocks the driving rain
535. my children's hearts awakening to their need for You
536. a warm fire on a cold day
537. love in this house
538. Your song in my heart
539. today's bread
540. forgiveness

Joyful, joyful, we adore Thee, God of glory, Lord of love...

The ability to love

2010-10-24T17:15:00.000-07:00

I'm reading a number of books right now (Lord, Only You Can Change Me, The Ministry of Motherhood, Grace-Based Parenting) and they are all converging on the same theme, growing up in Christ. Yesterday I was listening to Beth Moore on overcoming insecurities and what it really means to guard your heart. What she said was, that when God guards His heart, He is guarding His totally biased ability to love His children. He guards His ability to love. If love is the excellent way, if it's love that casts out all fear, if what we are commanded to do is love God and one another, maybe that's what we need to guard, too.

What I want...

2010-10-20T21:18:00.000-07:00

...is a clean house and a manageable schedule. When I pray about it the Spirit speaks to my soul, "All of those things are within your control." And they are. It just means I have to say no to myself, and to my children.

I Shall Not Want

2010-10-13T10:51:00.000-07:00

I don't want to take these words out of context for anyone. They say, "The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want," and they mean because He is caring for me and watching over me I will have all I need.

But one day, the Spirit challenged my heart to consider what my trust would look like if I wasn't wanting all the time. And the verse my heart settled on was:

Psalm 131:2
But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me.

And the words were "content" and "quiet trust."

"Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted..."

What do these words mean to you?

I realized I've been wanting many things. I want my children to just listen to me, do what I say, think what I think and not challenge me in anything. That doesn't even line up with my belief system or homeschool philosophy. When I first began teaching my children, it was so that when they had questions, we could search out the answers together. We could explore the world around us. They could run and think and grow. But I grew weary of them constantly challenging me during a time when I truly did need them to obey for their safety and I ditched my beliefs and started following these wants...

I wanted a bigger house, got it, now have been wanting a smaller house...

I've been wanting my husband home and wanting to carry on in our current lifestyle...

I've been wanting time by myself, but not wanting to even spend the last few minutes of the evening alone...

I've been wanting to live self-controlled but still wanting to eat as I want...

Double-minded. I've found that I'm double-minded and all my wants are causing me to tear myself apart. Because the Spirit in me wants one thing, and the sin nature wants another. They can't both win. I have to yield, I have to trust. Sin leads to misery, so I need to trust the Lord.

I've made a shopping rule for myself: if it's not necessary food or clothing, I'm not buying it. It's an experiment for me, to see how many physical wants and desires I succumb to. (I need to clarify here that I have thus far consented that ice cream is needed food. So is Chinese food. This is a work in progress.) I'm picking up magazines at the check-out, remembering and putting them back. I'm putting back tea-towels, cozy blankets and flower bulbs. I'm finding I have a lot of wants and it makes me wonder just what my life would look like if I was not wanting. And this is just the surface, there are many deep desires coming up. The kind of things arguments are made of, me shouting at my teen, at my pre-teen, because what I want does not line up with what is.

James 4:1
[ Submit Yourselves to God ] What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?

...the kingdom of God is...righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. For he who in this way serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. Romans 14:17-18

I read through this passage this morning trying to be open to fresh revelation of it. Wanting others to enter into my weak faith is often a pitfall in my life. When they refuse to wear shackles of doubt and fear for me, I often get mad. Not because I want them to wear those things, but because my desire to have them want only God and leave all other desires behind is so much bigger than my love for them. My wants get in the way of loving others.

"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want," could be written, "The Lord is my Shepherd, I will trust." Trust overcomes want. I'm not sure when, but I'm certain it will.

Made me Glad by Hillsong

2010-10-08T06:41:00.000-07:00

I will bless the Lord forever
I will trust Him at all times
He has delivered me from all fear
He has set my feet upon a rock
I will not be moved
And I'll say of the Lord

You are my Shield, my Strength
My Portion, Deliverer
My Shelter, Strong Tower
My very present help in time of need

Whom have I in heaven but You
There's none I desire beside You
You have made me glad
And I'll say of the Lord

You are my Shield, my Strength
My Portion Deliverer
My Shelter, Strong tower
My very present help in time of need

2010-10-06T11:45:00.001-07:00

I woke this morning feeling like I was coming out of a storm. It has passed and I feel light and happy and positive. I don't know what's different, I just feel that way. Joy comes in the morning.

There have been many pieces of my life and maybe they just came together. I'm not sure, we'll see how the days play out. Sometimes we need to cling to the hope we're given in Christ if we're not standing on it.

Can I tell you something? I think I am more afraid of fear, than I am of things happening. The fear of fear cripples me. I'm afraid I'm going to be afraid, too afraid to trust God if something goes wrong. Which isn't really trusting God now, is it? He is the Author and Finisher of our faith. So that is the wall I just hit, slid down, and lay at the bottom clinging. Perfect love casts out all fear, and this morning is joy filled. I'm excited for the changes God is bringing and the time I've been given to prepare. Don't want to miss a moment of it. Embrace everything I've been given.

So now I must be off because there is work to be done. Have a glorious morning! And be assured, God loves you very much!

Quiet trust

2010-09-28T13:26:00.000-07:00

"Vicky! Come see my foot!" my son calls as a friend drives up beside us and gets out at the credit union, "look at my cast!"

"What did you do?" she cries.

"I broke it when I jumped off my bunk bed," he replies, proudly showing off his new crutches.

She shakes her head as she looks at me and says, "As if you don't have enough stress." I laugh and wonder what stress she thinks I have.

"Mom, are you that tired?" my daughter laughs as she pulls two cucumbers I've been looking for out of the freezer, the day after shopping. Two months before it was a watermelon and a bag of carrots in the deep freeze.

"Connie!" a voice cries out with obvious pleasure at finding me there in the bakery, filling a bag with muffins. I stand and turn to her, we chat as I wonder who she is. Just before she leaves, I recognize her. She's my best friend. That one shook me.

It's not Dementia or Alzheimer's, its just moving things around in my head so I can focus on my task. It only happens when I'm overtired or there's a lot going on. I know what it is so, usually, it doesn't scare me. But it does make a quiet life necessary. A quiet mind, a quiet heart. It's leftovers of a broken childhood and a broken mind, pieced back together by a loving God. The result, it seems today, is a growing, quiet trust. This gift from the Giver of good gifts to His children.

I'm asked, as I prepare this week's lesson, to give an example of God's goodness in my week. I will tell of the cucumbers and how He gave me grace to laugh and not be sad because I made that mistake. Because it is funny to find cucumbers in the freezer...

"I know your story. I've written your story, and it's going to be ok, because I will always take care of you." He is the Author and Finisher of our faith, able to present us blameless and pure and with great joy before the throne of God. To Him be the power and the glory!

Thank-You, Jesus.

This miracle

2010-09-27T22:13:00.000-07:00

Just this; to hold in my hand, behold with my eyes, the written Word of my Creator. This privilege. A thousand thank-You's.

And for this; quiet time in prayer, seeking You, finding You, the veil torn revealing Your presence, close, tender, real.

For this; nail-torn hands taking hold, pulling, lifting, shoulder of grace, comforting, carrying, rescuing.

If this was all, this is enough. You are enough Jesus.

Thank-You.

Thought provoking

2010-09-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

Orthodox worship can be culturally shocking to teen-agers who have spent their lives in the evangelical tradition. The 45 page Divine Liturgy used at Saint Sophia would be hard for newcomers to follow even if half of it wasn’t in Greek.

But there were parts that attracted the girls’ attention. There was an important moment when the priest emerged from the iconostas with a gleaming, silver covered Bible and announced like a medieval herald that all should attend because holy scripture was to be read. The many candles, the heavy scent of incense puffing out of censers, the dark wood, and the Orthodox art gave the room a majestic feel.

Read here.

First Photos

2010-09-15T22:15:00.000-07:00

The package arrives in the mail, the middle one, there were three. "I don't give them presents when everyone else gives them presents," my dad says over the phone, "it's their annual present."

"My camera!" delight fills her voice,"it's blue! Oh, look, it comes with a tri-pod! and a case! It has video...and macro! Oh! I can take flower photos! Oh, I so wanted a camera, Mom, how did he know? Did you tell him?"

God is love. Now experience it.

2010-09-14T14:04:00.000-07:00

“I passed a billboard and it made me think. Made me start reading my Bible, starting in the book of Proverbs.”

“What did the billboard say?” I need to know — what are the answers in this place? The translator is working hard, exchanging our words quickly, his eyes and mine never leaving each other, our faces close, urgent.

“The billboard?” Our faces are close, urgent, and I am anxious for a sign. Any sign. “The billboard, it said, “God is love. Now experience it.”

more here

2010-09-14T08:23:00.000-07:00

As a little child, through the gift of dissociation, I held my mother's hand, looked up into her face and adored her. I thought she was the most beautiful, wonderful...most children do, don't they? And that closeness remained with my parents all through the years, not honouring them, though I know what that looks like now, I didn't then. But loving them.

As an adult the love often revealed hatred, the closeness, resentment. These were emotions I didn't understand and I cried out to God, "Why? Why these emotions? Where do they come from?" The answers tumbled from the sky and poured out of boxes of memories in my mind. Memories sorted and stored away when I was small and couldn't handle the experiences and still love, still be cared for by those same hands. So my God lifted the burdens, packaged them up and stored them until later, when I could survive them.

I was wrecked by those flashes of insight, torn, not in two, but into tiny little shards that kept sifting through the hands around me trying to hold me, piece me back together. I had no idea evil was so...evil, nor dark so dark. I cried out to God but lost my faith. He, however did not lose His and my question, "If this is true, how can there be a God who is love?" didn't even phase Him. He just loved me right through it, until I was whole again. He held my home in tact, and gave us deeper faith through it. I lost any desire to dabble in things not of God. He is light, all else is darkness that grows deeper black.

The things I've lost can not compare with Him who I have gained. There is no pit He can't reach into, no darkness He can't see through, no pain He can't heal, for He is the Creator of all and His love knows no bounds. Cry out to Jesus.

And everyone who calls on the name of the LORD will be saved. Joel 2:32a

2010-09-14T08:10:00.000-07:00

I'm never sure about this page. It is a prayer, outpouring of gratitude and praise to my Father in heaven to whom I am to pray in secret, yet here it is blazoned across the world for all to see. At times it leaves me hidden and shy from God because my heart says it is so blatantly wrong, then my son comes along and says that it is good and right to reach out in community and share our hearts and experiences with the world around us and encourages me to keep on.

But through that same struggle, longing only to pray in secret, I long only to give in secret, for this is Christ's way, and that held me back from encouraging you to visit Ann's blog while she was away and maybe you have missed some very important moments in your life. Moments when you emptied of self and offered a cup of water to a little child, or let one come to Jesus. Maybe because I didn't write what was on my heart, you didn't even know she was there. Let me say this, God is merciful.

So, though I am not ready to share my response to her pleas, may I share her trip with you. Please go. Scroll down, see the pictures, read the words. Be still and know that He is God and He is good and He has a plan for you that is perfect.

More Wind God!

2010-09-01T13:57:00.000-07:00

"Yay! More wind! You are awesome God! You are mighty! You make the wind and we can't at all!"

We are stacking wood with children who would rather not, but they're helping intermittently, a couple loads then off to play, and who can blame them? For we took the giant tarp off the woodpile and hung it up to dry and giant puffs of wind grab it and push it up to the sky. It crumples and flaps, beckoning the children, "Come play!"

So they do with great abandon, calling out to their Creator when the wind dies down, "More wind, God, please send more wind!" They are playing with their Father in heaven in the exact way they play with their Daddy on earth. "Higher Daddy, higher! Push me higher! Please, just one more swing, I can't get myself that high!"

Mark 10:15
I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."

Acts 2:1-3
When the day of Pentecost came, they were all together in one place. Suddenly a sound like the blowing of a violent wind came from heaven and filled the whole house where they were sitting.

More wind, Abba! Please, more wind!You are awesome, mighty in power, God!

Life

2010-08-30T21:47:00.000-07:00

It's late and I'm tired, but this is a very thankful day.

I'm thankful for the lives of the people around me. For the four children here, for our parents and siblings, aunts and uncles, for the families in our church, for our homeschooling group, for our neighbours, teachers, dentist, doctors, veterinarians and mechanics. I'm thankful for my friends in and among them, and my friends around the world.

I'm thankful for the wee babies snuggled in their mama's tummies surrounded by papas and multiple siblings.

I'm thankful for the minister's cat, his wife and all his friends around him. His life is a bright light in a dark place and just seeing him fills me with great joy at the mercy and wonder of God.

I'm thankful for the friend who nearly wasn't here, but is, turning what would have been great sorrow into even greater joy.

I'm thankful that God is here, He is in control, His heart is goodness towards us and He's taking us someplace good.

I'm thankful for the prayers of Jesus and the prayers of his people, this continued conversation between Father, Son and Spirit and us, His children around the table.

It's a good day because God is in it and people are in it and I am not here alone.

I'm thankful I'm alive, because life is an incredible gift from our heavenly Father and I love unwrapping it.

I'm thankful for all I've been through and the comfort I've received so I can offer comfort to others in need.

Life is precious, Father. What an incredible idea. I'm so thankful You thought of us.

#511-530

Think of the cow.

2010-08-28T18:18:00.000-07:00

It eats green grass and makes it into white milk. Now that's amazing.

From The Evidence - for Kids by Ray Comfort

A Given Hour

2010-08-27T18:39:00.000-07:00

I didn't expect life to be this hard, this busy. I didn't expect to get angry with my children or myself. I jumped in with both feet, married at 20, baby at 20, 3 more to follow over the next thirteen years. I didn't expect to have a husband who had to work away to feed us, or to ever eat out three times a week, because town where we do everything is not near home where we live. I didn't expect the wind tunnel effect, the days to fly by, all that ice cream to permanently land on my hips (grin).

I thought I was going to grow up and play with my kids. I thought we'd be friends all the time. I thought Daddy would come home at the end of the day to a house that I had cleaned in an hour and a nice meal and clothes on the line and we all would work together on Saturday to clean our house and car and work in the garden together. I thought we would all want to work and play together. I thought that was what a family was for.

I expected this gift to always feel like a gift. Something beautiful to behold, to cherish. And it is, when I'm sitting here to behold it, fingers typing on the keys. Why isn't it when my girl wants a seat while we wait at the mechanic's for an hour, and there isn't one, or when my boy won't stop blowing bubbles in his lemonade while being asked to repeatedly at increasing volume and shrillness by his sister? Why do I miss the gift in those moments? I don't know why.

I don't really know why I find life hard at all. I just don't like conflict, I guess. But what if I could see it all as a gift. What if my gift eyes stayed open all the time, my heart pumped normally during the mini dramas, there were no anxiety attacks, or fits of hopelessness. What if I just took it as all good, truly?

Yesterday, my son drove my car into a ditch. At a blueberry farm. As we were leaving. He called a tow-truck and I grabbed my bowl to pick more berries. I had a lovely conversation with a woman I had never met before. My daughter caught a frog. A friend took a bird's nest to show my kids. They got to hold it. One son used firewood to build a bridge under the tire to make the car easier to pull out. "I know what to do, Mom, " he said proudly.

I said to him as we filled the bowl together, "No great loss without some small gain," (Ma from the Little House books.)

He answered, "No great gain without some small loss." Immediately, my perspective changed. Suddenly the hour at the blueberry farm was great gain. Whatever happened with the car was small loss, worth the gain of the hour.

The tow truck rescued us, we went for ice cream, the wheel was grinding when we backed out. Today at the shop, while fixing the minor damage, the mechanic found two potentially very dangerous problems with my car. As he showed me, I was so grateful to be there, rather than blithely driving along with a tire about to blow or two front wheels about to fall off. Grateful that I was sent (forced to go) to that shop. Grateful for the heads-up and for the Father who is in control of all things and orders my days. It truly is all working towards good.

So I pray for this perspective, the endless gifts. To always see it all this way. To receive the peace Christ died to give. To let go of all reactions other than trust in God. To accept the small losses that come with the great gains and stop expecting it all to be easy. Some days may be hard, but they are all good days, because God is in them, behind them and even enjoying them, I think.

Thank-You Father, for:

501. sloppy joes, potatoes and asparagus for supper
502. dishes to wash
503. kind mechanics
504. so many people praying
505. hidden things brought to light
506. salmon caught, I hope
507. homeschooling
508. children to love
509. ice cream, anyway
510. that they are home

Even in Work

2010-08-23T21:38:00.000-07:00

Last summer my whole focus was the garden and canning. We just made jam, didn't venture out into the vast world of home preserving and today I pulled the last three jars of last summer's efforts out of storage and my children put them onto the pantry shelves.

This summer the focus has been camping and kid's camp, teen camp and VBS. We've had four different sets of company come to stay. You could say that last summer was about produce and this summer about people. I'm better with produce, but not very good with either. Still, we've had a lot of fun. Both years have been experiments, practice, trying really hard and still falling short.

Like tonight. Nine p.m. When the children gather around me to watch me experiment putting blackberries through the juicer and splattering them everywhere, then watch me make a few adjustments and do it all over again.

I'm tired. I've made three trips into town today, one of them through town and all the way to the northernmost harbour and back. Three meals accomplished, three loads of bedding washed, the gardening done, we have a very early start tomorrow and I decide this is a good day to make jam. And it was. One batch which is happily in the freezer. This second batch, though, was a wrong choice. It meant the end of the day with me yelling. It meant no stories before bed. No cuddles. None of the things we all love best about the day.

The jam not getting made this year didn't matter to me. It was just a different focus this summer, I can buy jam. Today I had a couple hours, ripe berries and a desire to bless my husband and children. I got carried away. And ruined a happy evening. Because even in work, I need to exercise self-control. Nine o'clock is wind-down time, not plug-in, turn-on time. Had I done this earlier in the day, I wouldn't have been so frustrated or tired, I wouldn't have over-reacted. Even in work, I need to exercise self control. New rule. The kitchen closes at eight.

And still, God reigns. He blesses, His heart is good towards us. Mercy is new every morning and so I have hope.

Thank-you Father for all the good things today:
481. A quiet breakfast time with one, then the other
482. VBS
483. unexpected tea with a friend
484. peaches
485. comforting presence of our middle son
486. homecoming of our eldest
487. olive rosemary bread
488. beads shining brightly and a rainbow of sarongs flying in the wind
489. sunshine on the ocean
490. happy chatter on the boardwalk
491. corn on the cob, butter, peach-blackberry crisp and cream
492. buckets of blackberries
493. willing helpers
494. white lilies and purple coneflowers
495. fresh milk and eggs, a frisky calf, farmboy friends and a friend I love
496. hubby's voice, wise and kind
497. answered prayers and prayers to pray
498. skilled tradesmen
499. a new little friend
500. Your presence over everything

Thank-you, Jesus

Robin's adventures

2010-08-18T11:11:00.000-07:00

camp photos here

kitchen comic There is a series going on, about a food inspector coming to a kitchen. It begins on August 4th, there are 5 in the series so far. Funny :)

We have one more weekend of guests in the cottage this summer, then Robin takes it over permanently. Then we shuffle another boy into his room, and suddenly, voila! my husband has an office.

A place for everyone :)

Is it still Monday?

2010-08-16T22:32:00.000-07:00

Anyone else enjoying the long summer days, but feeling at the end of them like they've been two, maybe three days? Time for bed. Just quickly, though:

Abba, thank-you for:
471. friends from far away come to stay
472. that you get a whole new family when you get married, and the longer you stay married, the more you get to know them
473. extra towels for guests
474. camp cots, old sheet sets, borrowed pillows
475. Settlers of Catan
476. the excitement of new finds on the beach
477. the directive to practice hospitality. I may never get it perfect, but without that verse, I probably wouldn't even try.
478. rolling salad rolls together
479. storytime
480. a good mechanic for times of trouble, like when your balljoint comes out of it's socket

2010-08-08T08:18:00.000-07:00

Thank-You Father for:

459. a girl, she's fun
460. restaurants
461. make-up and brushes
462. giggles, laughter and hugs
463. time together, just us
464. girls and women to share our joy with
465. tea parties
466. chocolate cupcakes with lots of sprinkles and the little hands that made them
467. closed doors
468. pretty dress-up clothes
469. life in general
470. the ability to receive what is given. I know it comes from You.

of hope

2010-08-05T08:47:00.000-07:00

I sat down at the computer at 11 p.m. last night, planning to contribute to Walk with Him Wednesday, but my children, 8 & 10, still up, gathered around and asked if we could return to the link of newly discovered tumblebooks. I let them. It had been a long couple of days, good happy days mixed up with terrible fights between them and a midnight run to the emergency room with what looked like appendicitis (but wasn't, thankfully.) Day moved into night moved into day with very few boundaries, so we all sat quietly together, while the computer read us bedtime stories. We had eaten dinner just after 10, because we had decided after our big lunch fruit was a good dinner. It wasn't. It left us all climbing out of bed in search of food. Hot broth filled with noodles hit the spot, though. So for the second day in a row, I crawled into bed with the dishes undone, the house completely disordered and no hope that today would be any better.

Quietly, the Spirit of God whispered to my heart, "Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed. Of course there is hope." With those words resting in my heart, I dropped peacefully into sleep, remembering that whatever happens today, Jesus is with me and that is enough.

2010-08-03T20:08:00.000-07:00

There is a wonder in my heart at the way God moves in and through our lives. How He takes the small pieces and fits them together, weaves the threads in and around.

If you are reading this, you surprise me, but it's ok, you are welcome here. If you know Jesus, you are part of my family and if you don't, you can and become part of the body of Christ.

It is a place He created so we would be cared for and have someone to care for. You can begin by simply praying, "Lord, I want to be part of a family like that, please make room for me." The doors will open and you will find there is already room for you, there always has been. In Christ alone, there is room for everyone who comes.

If you are praying, you must believe in Him enough to try. If you believe in the Father and in the Son He sent to die to pay the price, that He rose to life again and is seated with the Father in heaven, you enter eternal life and all of heaven is open to you. You will learn to hear His voice when you are baptized in water and Spirit. Your Spirit will come alive and connect with God and you will know Him and His laws will be written on your heart. You will know the will of God, and You will follow Him, because you will know His Way is good. Don't be afraid that you will have to give up everything to follow Jesus. It isn't a "have to". You will want to be free of the things that hold you back from all He has for you. He will help you.

You will hear His voice, read His words, know His way, receive His help and experience His joy. Turn from the life and beliefs that have kept you from feeling the love of God, your Creator and Christ Jesus, His Son and turn to Him. Say "Yes Lord." Come into Him today.

2010-08-03T07:29:00.000-07:00

He rises early, getting ready to drive his bike down the high hill, onto the ferry, then down the long twisting, turning highway to work. I stand in the gravel after helping fill his lunch kit, he whispers, "I love you," and is gone for another week, a short one this time. But still it aches. It ached when he leaned over on the stairs to tie his boots and said, "I feel like I'm 18 again. Not really. I'm an old man." The strength beginning to fail, not much, just a little and with it, the realization that things will change, they can't go on like this forever.

Praise to the God who knows all things and leads us towards life eternal.
Thank-you, Father, for:
455. holding the love together when all the world rips and tears at it
456. planting the feet here, this is home, a place for him to return to, to find rest
457. letting me be his helper. Oh God, please make me a better one
458. hope in You for all our tomorrows

2010-07-25T16:29:00.000-07:00

Seafair Sunday Service at the beach, all churches taking part, worshipful mix of quiet people sitting, people standing, swaying, hands raised, some clap, some don't. Denominations all mixed up, Baptists sitting next to Lutherans, Salvation Army singing with community church members, Foursquare preaching, and hey, we're bent on revival. What a grand morning, being the body together worshiping the Lord. Ah, and the ones who don't know Jesus, wandering by, stopping to listen, well, that's why we're there. Great joy! Loving each other in the presence of His majesty and sharing the Gospel message. 'Tis good, aye.

The Cost of Love

2010-07-21T15:43:00.000-07:00

You give and take away...

My little cat sprinkled through these blogs is gone. I had to put her down today so she would no longer suffer the suffocation she's been fighting since Sunday. A fungal infection had eaten her lung tissue to the point that there was only two tiny spots left. Her sides heaved in and out as she fought to draw breath, and she shook, struggling harder to breathe every time she purred, which was anytime we drew near to her.

I love my cat. Beyond the comprehension of my not-animal-people friends, so I haven't shared with them the grieving I've been doing since the diagnosis. I have prayed for my little cat. She was my baby. I rocked her and sang to her and rubbed noses with her. She gazed into my eyes, caressed my cheek with her paw and sang to me with purrs so loud they could be heard in another room. She was a gift from God when my heart was hard and scared to care for anyone, and through her love God opened my heart again and let the light pour in.

And I am so grateful. Grateful for all those hours with the precious, little, furry lapful, the warmth on cold nights, the purr-song when my heart was lonely, the contentment she displayed, the playfulness, the cuddles, the company. If you are a cat person, you understand. If you aren't a cat person, you don't. Even if you are a cat person, you don't, because I've never met a happy, affectionate, patient, contented cat like Hazel before. And I wasn't a cat person, at least I hadn't been for a long time, until God placed her in our family and into my arms, and into my heart. She was a lifeline.

...my heart will choose to say, Lord blessed be Your name...

remembering...

2010-07-19T08:19:00.000-07:00

the day God healed the migraines that I had had since I was eight years old.It was the year I turned 30. I was so excited! I jumped up and down as I told my story, "...walking and leaping and praising God!" I was sure it was just the beginning and miracles and healings would be poured out through our congregation. That didn't happen, I'm not sure why it didn't, but that excitement is returning. From that day, my faith in God's power to heal never left me. I have seen Him heal again and again. He is all-powerful. A very real and present help in times of trouble.

451. for healing, Father
452. for the people who willingly laid hands on me and prayed
453. for the release from migraines
454. for a greater ability to care for my children
454. for freedom from many food allergy triggers
454. for ever-deepening faith in Your goodness

You are awesome Mighty God!

2010-07-12T22:44:00.001-07:00

It was almost nine as I headed out to water the garden, mostly because I am weary and the couch, though not comfortable, held appeal. I love my garden, though, especially being in my garden. The weeding and watering draw me close to poppies revealed in twilight, bright rebirth of pink geraniums and striped French marigolds amidst the tomatoes. To blueberries that are actually blue and tiny, luscious red strawberries fallen in the grass. Going out later seemed to spare me from regular mosquito attack. Mental note taken as I snapped the sugar snap peas and picked up a new potato I must have missed yesterday.

I left the hummingbird feeder at the cabin because I couldn't bear to take it from the dear pair of wee friends we'd made this week. They danced together around our patio, trying to get nectar from the bud shaped red lights strung above, then came up the window and watched us, almost asking, "Do you have any real food?" So, on one trip home to water feline friend and plants I picked up the feeder. We were definitely rewarded. She would sit on the wire above and rest, while he drank and then flew off. He'd come back and "chip, chip" to her, she would "chip, chip," back. He would fly up, rub beaks, then slip back down to sip, before flying off again. She sat contented and watched us, finally sipping again herself and flying away.

I missed the sea lions, unsure of leaving the younger kids on shore with their older brother with the broken ankle and both parents out on the water together. My husband took his camera and captured snapshots that took my breath away. The second to last night, the kids finally in bed, we sat out with our teen under the stars by the fire, glowing lights in the warm air, quiet voices murmuring over the gentle sound of waves lapping on the shore only a few steps away. Earlier there had been diamonds sparkling on the water, and a crystal blue sky. It was an amazing week, perfect weather, loving friends, precious time with my husband and children.

I almost missed it all, caught up in imagined pressure, trying to please people who would not be pleased no matter how hard we tried, nervous and shaken by some very real traumatic moments. But God caught me in time to turn it around for the last day, to relax and receive the gift from my husband who made the plans and paid the price, our friends, who allowed us to have their reservation and my God, who every day aligns the heavens and earth and pours out amazing blessings.

The last day was a scramble to get out of there and again I was anxious. Anxious to get to church, to be there for our friends first official Sunday as the new pastors, there to catch last glimpses and say a final good-bye to pastor and friend now gone. The memories of the week filtered in as the sermon spoke to right where I was at. Remembering my joy over the young adults, comfortable and happy, making music and singing worship, then learning afterwards our neighbours resented it. Still, it is good that when God's people come together, that worship happens. Perhaps if they hadn't sung, the rocks would have cried out!

My husband and I concur, we like vacation!

Thank-you Father, for:

433. turning me around
434. hummingbirds, especially that pair
435. maple leaves, their special hue of green
436. water fights for the boys
437. time to rest and heal
438. sand - I love sand
439. ocean blue and sky blue and pink-streaked sky blue and dark storm ocean blue - I love blue
440. waves lapping
441. swimming with family and friends
442. licorice jujubes
443. roasted banana s'mores
444. Wes being there
445. marriage
446. children - not just ours, all children, but yes, especially ours
447. swings in trees and logs shaped like pirate ships and a pirate cafe born of imagination and the many times I ate there, watching my young son entertain with pirate disco, being served oyster shells filled with seaweed and shells lined purple
448. acoustic guitars and the voices around them
449. swallowtail butterflies
450. children's skulls cradeled in Your hands protected from large rocks thrown in childish anger. It could have been so bad, but it wasn't. Thank-You for being there.

In Jesus' name. Amen

2010-07-08T07:33:00.000-07:00

"What is dead may be dormant and what is barren may be about to bear and wild things can somehow find a way to bloom." Ann Voskamp

read more at Holy Experience

2010-07-04T14:08:00.000-07:00

"Somewhere in our dark, we can forget what is lost for the tender wonder of what is found." Ann Voskamp

more here...

2010-06-28T14:05:00.001-07:00

watch

Yesterday...

2010-06-28T06:43:00.000-07:00

My pastor gave her last sermon to our church. It was poignant and full of grace, contained elements of encouragement, confession, love and release. It was well done. Most of all, it was right.

It was right because we all know this is an act of God. He said, "step down, make way," and she listened, because she's known all along it's God's church, not hers, that she was there to serve "for such a time as this," and now she's done. God has other things for her and other things for us.

Because of God's faithfulness in and through her, we are moving forward as one body, united in love and fellowship. It is good. We will miss her, but it is good.

Thank-you Father, for:

428. purity
429. a pastor who loves You and loves Your church
430. eyes that see, ears that hear and a heart that understands
431. new opportunity born amidst the ending
432. friendship

Please bless her on her way. In Jesus' name, Amen

Reading!!!

2010-06-25T08:46:00.000-07:00

I've read all the philosophies about reading early and late. I have two sets of kids, my first and third were early talkers/readers, and my second and fourth, late talkers/readers. The earlies talk to express themselves and connect with people, the laters talk to be understood. I love them all, and it was comforting with the younger kids to have walked through learning with the older ones and to have seen these patterns. But when my youngest turned eight and wasn't reading, there was suddenly outside pressure on him directly. Comments were made. Someone actually said, "If you're not reading the next time I see you, I'm going to teach you myself!" We don't see her much, and she had forgotten by the time we got there, so the pressure came off again. He had kind-of pushed away reading lessons, and has been working on it quietly alone. And today he read me a whole book; There is a Bird on Your Head!

Glee!

Father, thank-You for homeschooling, and children learning at their own pace and reading and books and Your written word.

In our house, when you learn to read, you get to go to the Christian bookstore and choose the Bible you would like. He's very excited :) Unfortunately, we don't have a Christian bookstore, but he's willing to wait until we get to one.

I shall not want

2010-06-24T15:59:00.000-07:00

I have always read the words, "I shall not want," as "I shall not be in need." God will take care of me, He's got my back.

But this week, my heart hear's, "I shall not want." It then echoes with:

But I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me.
Psalm 131:2

But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.
1 Timothy 6:8

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Matthew 6:19-21

"So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Matthew 6:31-33

Isaiah 30:15a
This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength..."

And the Spirit says to my heart, "Connie, you're hoarding."

"I am?" I answer. "Am I not supposed to?"

Quietly we go over these verses again.

And again.

And I ponder a continual lust for more...it comes from this verse:

Ephesians 4:19
Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.

Is shopping an impurity?

Is purchasing possessions an impurity?

There is evidence in my life of a continual lust for more. More food, more books, more stuff...

Greed is killing me. Both I and my home are over stuffed.

I concur, I'm hoarding. What next, Lord?

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want...

Like Riding a Bike

2010-06-23T07:09:00.001-07:00

Do you remember the day you went from trying to ride a bike, to realizing you were riding a bike? That moment of, "Hey, I'm doing it! I am riding my bike!" It's a joy and a release and something, that once you've got it, you never lose. It may get rusty, but with a little practice, you pick it right back up again.

I had a moment like that this morning as I was reading Beth Moore's Believing God. It says, "...in between dramatic revelation, what's a believer to do? The day-in, day-out fundamentals, that's what. Prayer. A daily time in God's Word. Praise and worship. Attending church. Serving a church body. Giving. These are the fundamentals and they'll never change..." And I thought, "Hey, I'm doing it! Look what God has done for me!

Twenty years ago, I wasn't doing those things. Twenty-three years ago, I was working to pay to go drinking with my friends. We all worked together and all partied together, round the clock sometimes. We'd go to work, then go to the bar, then go to the little house by the railroad tracks, then get up from there and go to work again.
That was my routine.I lived on popcorn, Cheerios, pizza and hard liquor for a year. It was a frightening, miserable existance. Then God sent my husband-to-be back into my life to marry me and take care of me, he gave me a son to give my life purpose and meaning, then slowly, slowly over the years He brought me into the church community, reattached me to the body, and gave me these things. I grew up in the church until my early teens, but the day-in and day-out fundamentals came slowly. Lot's of trying. Lots of practice. Many hard falls...

Yet today, there's so much more, because the day-in, day-out fundamentals include rejoicing and thankfulness. They are part of the balance and they, too, came slowly and have taken practice. With God's patience with me, I am learning to be patient with Him and that leaves so much room for His glory and praise.

My life verse is John 3:21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.

Isn't it amazing what God has done!

2010-06-22T18:50:00.000-07:00

"Today, the circumstances you are in, the limitations you have, the relationships you have been given is the place in which God is present..."

Read more of Sally Clarkson's words here

Thankful for the good things from Mom

2010-06-21T10:15:00.000-07:00

We don't watch television at home, but recently my husband and I were away for a weekend and watched some cooking and fishing shows. As commercial came on, my husband said, "This is my favourite commercial. Watch." Three boys are at the kitchen table painting each other's faces. The mom comes down the stairs and says, "Boys..." They all look up expecting to get in trouble. The mom laughs and says, (I think) "...the blue goes on the other side." They all laugh and she comes to help get them decorated to watch their favourite team play on the t.v. It might be a paper-towel commercial? (But is a great how-to-be-a-mom commercial.)

He looks over at me and says, "She came downstairs and they thought they were in trouble. You expect them to get in trouble, most moms wouldn't like what they were doing because it made a mess. But instead she encouraged them and helped them. I love it, it always makes me smile because she's just like you. I love that about you, you're such a great mom."

Now, I didn't really think my husband liked that about me. At times it has driven him crazy, with all the bugs my kids bring in the house to show me! We look them up on the computer while he is saying in the background, "Get it outside!"

So when he said this it blessed me more than I can fully explain. I opened up in a new way because I felt safe and loved in a new way. I can't change this, the wonder I have in my children's discoveries and interests. It's one of the things I like about myself. It's one of the good gifts handed down to me by my mother. She was amazing in the way she encouraged my discoveries. Every stray I brought home she cared for. Every project she encouraged. One day on my paper route I came across an abandoned, reeking aquarium, clogged with algae, containing a dying aquatic frog. I knocked on the door to be sure I could take it, then ran home, the best I could, with my new treasure! No, she wanted to say no I'm sure, but it went out on the patio and I was sent to the library and pet store to gather information and soon it was in the house, cleaned up, with a happy, breathing, swimming frog in it. That interest led to lizards and she somehow smiled as she fed them mealworms, which ate their way out of the plastic container and into her living room. Really, mealworms are just like maggots and should not be squirming in an immaculate house on the table under a lamp...and so it was with the numerous stray dogs and cats and spiders, snakes and tadpoles turned to frogs. With the snails, the duck, the momma cat with the box full kittens that kept having kittens...

Can I say, I'm not that easy-going. There are no lizards and mealworms here, though I did do bloodworms for frogs from the ditch...

My mom's creativity and support of my interests shaped the way I view the world and motherhood and for all these gifts, I'm grateful.

Father, I'm thankful for my mom's help growing up with:
415. wallpapering my dollhouse
416. baking in my Easy Bake oven
417. sewing my Barbie's clothes on my little sewing machine (the one that was supposed to glue the fabric together, but then my mom had to stitch it all together with tiny stitches afterwards because the glue never held)
418. teaching me to embroider
419. learning to swim and watching us for hours at the pool
420. making candles for Christmas gifts
421. writing letters to penpals
422. having my own zoo
423. writing poetry
424. cleaning my room, the bathroom, etc.
425. making crafts
426. playing the recorder
427. letting me help with her projects

Swallowtail

2010-06-17T23:28:00.000-07:00

Fringed yellow wings
reflect sun's rays resting long
sipping sweet nectar

Why we do this

2010-06-14T11:42:00.000-07:00

Counting fish and nets that don't tear http://www.aholyexperience.com/

Jesus came, through the kind and the good and the patient, to show and lead the way into light and air. Every day is new and it's all a learning experience, practicing putting one foot in front of the other. It is hope and joy and peace and sometimes I slip and fall back into fear but He always catches me and helps me up again and I am held close to His heart, not snatched from His hand. If you ever question if Jesus is the right way, I assure you, He is the only way. Grab hold, drink long and find His better way.

today's fish in a net unbreaking:

404. Victory Over the Darkness and Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson
405. sweet ladies who devote their time to little girls to teach them of God
406. and gifts they give; pansy doilies and Rainbow Garden by Patricia St. John
407. authors who write stories of normal, daily life following God for those of us who have a very different experience and wouldn't otherwise know what that looks like
408. truth that sets you free
409. authors who write books and blogs that teach skills for every day life, like cooking, cleaning, laundry, gardening and even facing your past and reconciling it with your presence and future
410. people who share their stories - you know what, we're not all the same, but we can learn from each other
411. the faithfulness of God, never-ending, never-failing
412. light...I love everything about light
413. colour and sky and air and joy and freedom and love and everything that goes with a relationship with Jesus who loves us so much He died to set us free
414. perfect love that casts out fear and births faith, hope and love

Father, thank You for...

2010-06-13T22:21:00.000-07:00

386. safe relationships
387. people who pray
388. Christian hospitals
389. caring surgeons and nurses and paramedics
400. kind hotel owners and ferry operators
401. pain medication
402. quick recovery
403. patient, helpful, grateful children

Time spent with God...

2010-06-06T22:36:00.001-07:00

...is what time is for.

Thanks Ann.

Time spent with God...

2010-06-06T22:36:00.000-07:00

...is what time is for.

Thanks Ann.

Life's Work, 2

2010-05-22T09:26:00.000-07:00

My second son is very active in our community. He's devoted to the cause he's promoting, volunteers and takes part in many things. He doesn't know it, but he's a lot like me, like I was at his age...only better.

It began because I said he'd want to do community service of some sort to include in his portfolio for university application and giving of one's time is part of being a Christian and part of being a Canadian citizen. He's become so busy now however, that I have to curb some of those interests to keep him involved in family. He doesn't always understand. "I'm just doing what you taught me and now you're rejecting me for it!" he said one day. We've worked through that, I think, and he knows I'm not rejecting him, just trying to bring in balance to his schedule.

But I was extremely grateful for those words and the understanding they brought, because how many times have my children felt that way? As we've spent time on some enjoyable activity, exploring their interest in it, they've followed it, but under conviction I've shed it, and as their interest has grown, I've rallied against it, leaving them feeling rejected. Much of it is my desire to get closer to God and bring them with me.

Part of it might be, though, my personality's short attention span, desire to finish something and move onto something new. Long-term commitment to projects is not a strength in me. 3 months and I'm ready to move on. My kids actually received a whole year of music instruction this year, rather than just September-November and April-June. Normally we spend December-March at home, doing nice home things, out of the yucky, cold, rainy, snowy weather. Driving to music in those months requires more of a commitment. Not much more, but I'd rather be doing something else.

When I hit these places of facing deficits in me, I wholly offer up praise to God, because He is so good. What else can I do? I am neither good, nor holy; neither selfless nor wise; neither strong or able. It is in Him that I am able to do all things, face all things, endure all things. In Him that I live and move and have my being. In Him that I grow and change. Left on my own there would be no hope...because I keep getting it wrong, no matter how hard I try. But in Him, I find the release to live a joyful life, because He makes up the lack, He fills in the gaps, He provides the wisdom, the understanding, the direction, the grace, the togetherness, the faith to try again. "All your sons will be taught by the Lord and great will be your children's peace." Isaiah 54:13NIV

As my understanding of God moves from things (do this, don't do that) to praise, my eyes are lifted up more and more to the One who is worthy, with a heart filled with love (not panic). In Him, I am finding everything, and because He has taught me, I know He will teach my(our) children.

But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God. John 3:21NIV

Life's Work

2010-05-21T22:29:00.000-07:00

I'm a homeschool mom, my whole adult life has been invested in this.

During this adult life, I have grown closer to God, shedding layers of the world as I go. The things I've left behind are many of things I've shared with the people I love the most, my husband and children. Some of them are deeply entrenched in my children's happiest memories. What do I do with that?

My first born spent many happy hours sitting between his dad and me when he was little playing Mario. Of course, now he wants to share the happiness with his little brother! If I deny him that, because I don't want his brother playing video games for many reasons, it's like saying, "It was all wrong, I don't like the way you turned out, and I don't want him to follow in your footsteps."

But here's the thing, I do want him to follow his footsteps. I like and love my first son! He's strong, creative, funny, smart, devoted to God and his family, responsible, self-supported at 21. He has a servant's heart. He is respectful, and respected in our community.

Here's the other thing; they're my happy memories, too. And as I've shed the things of the world, I've shed the memories that go with them, which has left me desperately floundering for the goodness in what I do. What is the purpose of all this if everything I do, impart, give, invest turns out to be wrong?

Praise the Lord that He knows it all at the beginning of the call. And that He will finish the good work He has begun in us.

I'm going back with my son to revisit our happy memories. Because God created those for us, just by putting us together. Let me share one with you:

Kideo; a group of children's entertainers that we were able to share as a family, because even my rocker husband enjoyed their show. For us, Kideo meant togetherness.

You can find more of Robin's work by following the link to the Metal Snail Idea Workshop.

So happy

2010-05-20T18:50:00.000-07:00

February first brought with it deep wracking coughs and sickness that May has banished. You know that feeling when you've finally turned the corner? So happy, so thankful Father!

My son, the philosopher

2010-05-20T18:44:00.000-07:00

"The ability to see the goal seems to make us want to reach it more, where as the inability to see your goal, makes us more likely to stop and smell the...flowers, and perhaps, wonder if there actually is a goal." Robin Gibson, metalsnail.net

When he wrote this , he was writing about video games, but I wonder if this is why we get lost along the way sometimes...when you lose sight of the goal, do you spend more time in worship? Are you more aware of the beauty around you and the glory of God?

To Watch

2010-05-19T08:20:00.002-07:00

http://www.thehighcalling.org/Library/ViewLibrary.asp?LibraryID=5575

of brides and grooms...

2010-05-16T20:48:00.000-07:00

Thank-You Father, for
372. dirt (the kind you plant seeds in)
373. sun
374. children all around
375. baby cries in church
376. change (the kind that brings new beginnings)
377. the power of God
378. that God reigns
379. good people
380. my dishwasher (it washes while I blog)
381. weddings where fathers walk down their daughters down the aisle and
382. dance with them
383. and brides glow
384. and grooms never take their eyes off their bride
385. and families celebrate together

and love comes down and I witness the Groom delighting in His bride, the church, all heaven open above and glory streaming down, angels singing, "Worthy is the Lamb who was slain." For a moment the pages of the book reveal and we are drawn into the promise of forever.

And tonight we watch The Princess Diaries and witness the process of being taken from the street and drawn into royal circles and responsibilities. There is so much to learn, so many new things to be concerned with, potentially embarrassing situations, fear overtakes, and the desire to flee, until love for others overcomes self and courage and commitment replace the longing to "be free to be me."

Heaven still open, the pages still reveal the plan of God to come and find us, and fit us to enter His kingdom and take part in His story.

Global Warming

2010-05-11T07:12:00.000-07:00

The day of the Lord's return will surprise us like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a loud noise, and the heat will melt the whole universe. Then the earth and everything on it will be seen for what they are. Everything will be destroyed. So you should serve and honor God by the way you live. You should look forward to the day when God judges everyone, and you should try to make it come soon. On that day the heavens will be destroyed by fire, and everything else will melt in the heat. But God has promised us a new heaven and a new earth, where justice will rule. We are really looking forward to that! My friends, while you are waiting, you should make certain that the Lord finds you pure, spotless, and living at peace. Don't forget that the Lord is patient because he wants people to be saved.

2 Peter 3:10-15 CEV

I receive so much peace when I search through the pages of this book and find everything to be exactly as God says. Even as I work to be a good steward of all He gives, I know we cannot change what's coming, and welcome Him as He draws closer.

Psalm 131:1-2 NLT
Lord, my heart is not proud;
my eyes are not haughty.
I don’t concern myself with matters too great
or too awesome for me to grasp.
Instead, I have calmed and quieted myself,
like a weaned child who no longer cries for its mother’s milk.
Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me.